I never feel more Disabled than I do at this time of year.
Let me explain: As the days get shorter and the weather gets colder, many Disabled or chronically-ill people like me will face more disabling factors than normal.
For me personally, I have osteogenesis imperfecta (OI), which means that I have brittle bones. So the damp air and rain really adds to my bone ache.
As a result, my day-to-day activities take longer, I expel more energy, and even my dexterity drastically decreases – struggling to grip a mug or a pen at times, which doesn’t usually happen to me.
To combat the cold, Disabled people often have to invest so much in heating (thankfully, I have managed to avoid this by working from my bed with a heated blanket or hot water bottles).
But this is just the physical toll.
The beautiful golden leaves falling from trees may be romantic to you, but they can be rather dangerous if you use a mobility aid. Just the other day, a pile of these leaves covered up a large pothole and nearly catapulted me out of my wheelchair.
On another occasion recently, I went on a spontaneous solo outing in my power-wheelchair to the supermarket, but I found myself trapped there for nearly an hour by a torrential downpour.
Water damage to my electric wheelchair – which then cost £10,000 to repair – is not like dropping a phone in a puddle and I can’t just go and grab a new one.
So when it rains more, I stay in more. This only adds to feelings of loneliness, frustration and a lack of independence.
On top of this, our independence can further be compromised by our support assistants or caregivers getting seasonal illnesses and calling in sick. And while these might just be sniffles to you – for people with medical conditions or compromised immune systems – they can be deadly for us.
So if we ask you to wear a mask, wash your hands or we turn down a rendezvous, please understand why.
Then there’s the fact that there are less people out and about if we urgently need help. Every Disabled person is different, but personally, I’ve always loved and relied on the help and support of strangers when I’m out and about.
During the summer months, I was in a bustling garden centre and was bursting for the loo. After finding the accessible bathroom, I couldn’t lower the support bar that was positioned next to the toilet, which allows me to safely transfer onto it.
So I popped my head out of the bathroom door and beckoned to the first person I saw for help. On this occasion, it was an unsuspecting man and I could see a glimmer of horror in his eyes, but everything was fine in the end.
I worry – with less people out and about in the cold, dreary months – I might not be so lucky next time.
Don’t even get me started about it getting darker earlier. The combination of poor streetlights and badly maintained pavements all add to a lack of wanting to venture out.
Can you see how exhausting all of that is to even think about as a Disabled person?
I know this time of the year can suck at times – irrespective of who you are. It can be cold, dark, and wet – bloody miserable out there.
But at the end of the day, if you are Disabled it can be just a little tougher. For me – and many others – the next few months can mean more isolation, less mobility, increased pain, and less support.
Can you see how exhausting all of that is to even think about as a Disabled person?
So I want to urge non-Disabled people to please be patient, show empathy and check in on us a little more.
This is especially important for me to highlight because Disabled people can already be subjected to stereotypes that may frame us as being lazy, incapable or even anti-social. But we are none of those things – rather, external barriers create disabling barriers.
So if I decline an invitation to come out for coffee or don’t take on as much work, it’s not that I don’t want to see you, it’s just that I am often too knackered.
Disabled people are just that people with an added layer of identity to consider. We still want to get involved in Christmas shenanigans, hang out and be merry. We still want to enjoy the seasons change and the magic of nature and we still want to feel included within society and our local communities.
We may now more than ever need a little more empathy, forethought and inclusive practices as we head into Winter and the New Year.
Reach out to us and ask if there is anything you can do to combat these Disabling barriers.
Do you have a story you’d like to share? Get in touch by emailing [email protected].
Share your views in the comments below.
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