‘Are you having a lot of sex right now?,’ asked my gynaecologist while peeking up from the sheet covering the lower half of my body.
At the time, I was in a long-term relationship and was indeed shagging a fair amount.
The doctor explained that – while our active sex life was perfectly healthy – our vigorous activities had caused light bruising around the entrance to my vagina.
Having had no idea that you can even bruise this part of your body, I was shocked.
That experience popped into my head recently – because if that’s what happened to me after shagging a man a lot in one week, I can hardly imagine how Lily Phillips felt after sleeping with 101 men in one day.
The OnlyFans rose to fame back in October, after taking on the extreme challenge, which she at first told the Metro she had enjoyed.
But a newly-emerged behind-the-scenes video reveals a different reality.
‘It’s not for the weak girls, if I’m honest – it was hard,’ Lily says, while in tears, adding: ‘I don’t know if I’d recommend it. It’s a different feeling. It’s just one in, one out, it feels intense.’
As if this footage wasn’t worrying enough, the 23-year-old sex worker has upped the ante – saying that she intends to sleep with 1,000 men in 24 hours.
I’m sex positive, and strongly believe that every person has the right to do as they please with their own body – but only so long as they don’t cause harm to themselves or others.
And it is clear that Lily is headed down a dangerous path.
I’m extremely worried about not only her welfare but also the message that these challenges send to viewers.
Concerned professionals are warning others not to follow in her footsteps – the phrase ‘Doctor Advice To Lily Phillips’ even has its own search page on TikTok.
It is no wonder that they are worried, since Lily’s lovers are not required to test for STIs, and she has herself admitted to not being clued up on how HIV spreads.
It was also shocking in the video to see that Lily didn’t regularly shower between lovers or take breaks.
Frankly, that mix of sweat and other bodily fluids from a large amount of sexual partners is a bacterial cesspool.
Meanwhile, setting aside the physical effects that constant penetration would have on Lily’s body, there is her mental wellbeing to consider.
It is entirely possible that the OnlyFans model considers her actions a form of sexual empowerment.
Perhaps this is her raising a middle finger to the patriarchy, which has long preached that women who have sex with a lot of men are sluts – which is categorically not true.
I can understand that argument.
While my own ‘number’ doesn’t come anywhere close to Lily’s, I used to consider sex an act of rebellion.
I was the woman who would shag whoever the hell I wanted, whenever I wanted, society’s opinions be damned.
I have no regrets – but I will admit that, at one point, I began to wonder if I was truly having sex for my own pleasure or to maintain an image.
Thankfully, I was able to give myself the time and space needed to look after my wellbeing.
But, unlike Lily, I didn’t have tens of thousands of viewers to appease.
I wholeheartedly support anyone who chooses a career in the adult industry, but great porn must always come with a level of safeguarding – for both workers and viewers.
Regular breaks, a clean environment and frequent check-ins with those involved is not only crucial, it is a basic right.
And frankly I find it impossible to believe that any woman would enjoy having sex with 101 – or 1,000 – men in such a short space of time.
To me, the video of Lily crying on set proves that there is something clearly missing.
I now believe this is not about pleasure but about shock value – it is sex for clicks.
We must acknowledge that she is making money from this challenge but the lack of responsibility by all involved is disturbing.
And that includes the men that she is having sex with.
In her last challenge, each man was given roughly four minutes.
Personally, I would bet money that many of these men were too focused on their own needs to even take Lily’s wellbeing into consideration.
Some of them apparently guilt-tripped the model because she was too exhausted or didn’t make them orgasm in their allotted time, saying things like ‘you’re not going to make me finish? I’ve come all this way’.
What an offensive way to treat a lover.
And what if the people watching these videos, many of whom could be impressionable young people with little knowledge of consent or pleasure, start to believe that this is a ‘normal’ situation?
Women, not only performers but ordinary girls with healthy sex lives, may think that they need to come up with similar challenges to keep a man’s interest.
They could believe that they are ‘weak’ for not being able to ‘take’ this many men in one go.
The sad reality is that the patriarchy is still alive and well. And women’s safety and pleasure is often overlooked in the bedroom.
If we fight fire by putting ourselves at risk, we will not win.
Lily is absolutely not responsible for the actions of others but for everyone’s sake, including her own, I hope that she reconsiders her next challenge.
For anyone reading this, know that you do not need to keep score when having sex. There is no perfect ‘number’ of sexual partners that you need to hit.
By all means, shag 1,000 people in your lifetime if that is what floats your boat – but there is no need to cram it into 24 hours.
Please, treat your body – and others’ – with respect. We will all have better sex for it.
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